Knowing a thing and not practising it is equivalent to not knowing. Very true indeed! I had always read that what people regret the most are often things which they didn’t do/say. Yet, all these days, I just didn’t practise this. And now, whenever I look back, I feel sad about things not said/done. There have been many times when I wanted to say something but could never overcome my mental inhibitions. But from now on, I would try to speak my mind.
So, what’s in my mind right now? At this juncture of life, when I have almost all elements of a successful life (touchwood), my mind is struggling to seek answers to some everyday dilemmas faced by me.
In life, just like management, nothing is absolutely black or white. Everything is a shade of grey and it depends on us as to what colour we give to it. Speaking one’s mind may sometimes hurt other people while by not speaking it, one may hurt oneself. We may choose either but not always should we choose the same one. Consistency in situations like this could be detrimental. But then how do we decide which one to choose under what circumstance?
This is one of the many questions which bother me. If everyone cares for his/her own happiness, wouldn’t everyone automatically be satisfied and happy? What if everyone cares for some other people but still no one cares for some people? What ultimately should be our goal – to be happy or to make others happy? I know the ideal answer is to be happy by being a reason for others’ happiness but not everyone can achieve this. How do I convince myself to be happy just by seeing others happy? What should then be the code of conduct for lesser mortals like me?
Or maybe, I should just stop thinking. Maybe, the happiest people in the world are the people who don’t think!
PS – This post could be incongruent and irrelevant as I just wrote what I was thinking.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Summer of 2011 : Last Part
Please read Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3 before reading this.
Intelligently or co-incidentally Adel had started running opposite to that boy. After running for a while, the noise of other people fainted and finally stopped. He did not know where he was. The only thing he knew was that he was tired and hungry. He wanted to eat the delicious dinner cooked by his mother and sleep on his soft bed. “I wish I could just go home every night, have dinner, sleep and leave home in the morning,” thought Adel. But at this moment he couldn’t even go home. He was lost and there was no one on the streets to help him get back home. However much he wanted to be independent, he knew he had to take help of someone and get back home.
He walked and walked and continued walking. Finally he came to a place where there were a few houses. He went up to a house and knocked the door. There was no response. He knocked again, this time with all the force he had. He could now hear some movement inside the house but still no one opened the door. He knocked again but in vain.
He decided to continue with his walking, taking random turns. He could barely lift his feet now. He was scared by the dark, lonely streets and walking alone seemed no more fascinating to him. He did not want to play anymore. He wished his mother called him from somewhere and took him from there. He would have to live in a small, dirty, smelly hut like that woman and would have to steal food like that boy if he lives alone. He certainly did not want that but he had no more energy to walk any further.
He felt like a cool breeze hitting his face. He smiled and opened his eyes. His parents were sitting beside him while he lay down on his bed. Seeing him smile his mother exclaimed, “Oh Adel! Where had you gone? We searched for you the entire night. Thank God the police found you lying on a street and you are safe and healthy. Why did you do such a thing? Do you know how we felt when you were gone? We love you so much dear. We stop you from playing so that you don’t get sick. We love you sweetheart and care for you. Promise me you won’t ever do this again.” She almost broke to tears as she said this.
Adel was happy to be home and see his parents. But he could not stop thinking about the women and the boy he met last night. He wished he could meet them again and give them something from his house.
PS: Finally my first 'long' short story is complete. All comments/suggestions are most welcome :)
Intelligently or co-incidentally Adel had started running opposite to that boy. After running for a while, the noise of other people fainted and finally stopped. He did not know where he was. The only thing he knew was that he was tired and hungry. He wanted to eat the delicious dinner cooked by his mother and sleep on his soft bed. “I wish I could just go home every night, have dinner, sleep and leave home in the morning,” thought Adel. But at this moment he couldn’t even go home. He was lost and there was no one on the streets to help him get back home. However much he wanted to be independent, he knew he had to take help of someone and get back home.
He walked and walked and continued walking. Finally he came to a place where there were a few houses. He went up to a house and knocked the door. There was no response. He knocked again, this time with all the force he had. He could now hear some movement inside the house but still no one opened the door. He knocked again but in vain.
He decided to continue with his walking, taking random turns. He could barely lift his feet now. He was scared by the dark, lonely streets and walking alone seemed no more fascinating to him. He did not want to play anymore. He wished his mother called him from somewhere and took him from there. He would have to live in a small, dirty, smelly hut like that woman and would have to steal food like that boy if he lives alone. He certainly did not want that but he had no more energy to walk any further.
He felt like a cool breeze hitting his face. He smiled and opened his eyes. His parents were sitting beside him while he lay down on his bed. Seeing him smile his mother exclaimed, “Oh Adel! Where had you gone? We searched for you the entire night. Thank God the police found you lying on a street and you are safe and healthy. Why did you do such a thing? Do you know how we felt when you were gone? We love you so much dear. We stop you from playing so that you don’t get sick. We love you sweetheart and care for you. Promise me you won’t ever do this again.” She almost broke to tears as she said this.
Adel was happy to be home and see his parents. But he could not stop thinking about the women and the boy he met last night. He wished he could meet them again and give them something from his house.
PS: Finally my first 'long' short story is complete. All comments/suggestions are most welcome :)
Summer of 2011 : Part 3
Please read Part 1 and Part 2 before reading this.
Lost in his thoughts, he was still walking very fast when suddenly he hit someone and fell down. A boy some years elder to him had also fallen down in front of him. Adel very politely apologised and stood up. The other boy did not say anything and looked behind. Adel asked him “Are you hurt? Are you waiting for someone? Why were you looking behind?”
The boy hurriedly replied, “It’s not your concern. Just go away.”
Adel’s curiosity forced him to continue, “Please tell me why you are looking so worried. This is such a pleasant night. This is just the perfect way to enjoy summer vacations.”
The boy was touched by his sweetness. After a long time someone had spoken to him in kind words. All he used to hear were the shouts and curses of people. After a moment of silence he said “Actually I was running away from some people. They are chasing me because I have stolen this bread from a shop,” and took out a piece of bread from under his shirt.
“Why did you steal? Don’t you know it is a bad habit? I will tell your mother and she would scold you,” said Adel.
“I don’t have my mother with me. I live alone and I had not eaten anything since yesterday. I was very hungry and had no money. So I just stole this once piece of bread. What else could I have done? No one gives me any work because I am not old enough. And even if they give me some small work, they don’t pay me and throw me out after a few days.”
Adel replied, “How can you not have your mother? Have you also left your home like me? Why do elders don’t understand children? They throw away so much of food. They can give that food to you. You would then not have to steal.” As he said this, he realized that he had not eaten anything since morning. He thought of the tasty dinner his mother used to make for him. He drooled at the mere thought of it.
The boy smiled at Adel’s idealistic suggestion and said, “I wish that were the case. Then many boys like me won’t have to sleep hungry. Wait a minute... Did I hear you correctly? Have you run away from your home? Why have you done such a thing? I have no parents and no house so I am living this way. You are lucky to have a home and nice parents. You should go back to them.”
Suddenly a noise started which soon became a shout. A few people were running towards them shouting and cursing the boy. The boy just said “Run” to Adel and started running in the opposite direction.
..... continued in last part
Lost in his thoughts, he was still walking very fast when suddenly he hit someone and fell down. A boy some years elder to him had also fallen down in front of him. Adel very politely apologised and stood up. The other boy did not say anything and looked behind. Adel asked him “Are you hurt? Are you waiting for someone? Why were you looking behind?”
The boy hurriedly replied, “It’s not your concern. Just go away.”
Adel’s curiosity forced him to continue, “Please tell me why you are looking so worried. This is such a pleasant night. This is just the perfect way to enjoy summer vacations.”
The boy was touched by his sweetness. After a long time someone had spoken to him in kind words. All he used to hear were the shouts and curses of people. After a moment of silence he said “Actually I was running away from some people. They are chasing me because I have stolen this bread from a shop,” and took out a piece of bread from under his shirt.
“Why did you steal? Don’t you know it is a bad habit? I will tell your mother and she would scold you,” said Adel.
“I don’t have my mother with me. I live alone and I had not eaten anything since yesterday. I was very hungry and had no money. So I just stole this once piece of bread. What else could I have done? No one gives me any work because I am not old enough. And even if they give me some small work, they don’t pay me and throw me out after a few days.”
Adel replied, “How can you not have your mother? Have you also left your home like me? Why do elders don’t understand children? They throw away so much of food. They can give that food to you. You would then not have to steal.” As he said this, he realized that he had not eaten anything since morning. He thought of the tasty dinner his mother used to make for him. He drooled at the mere thought of it.
The boy smiled at Adel’s idealistic suggestion and said, “I wish that were the case. Then many boys like me won’t have to sleep hungry. Wait a minute... Did I hear you correctly? Have you run away from your home? Why have you done such a thing? I have no parents and no house so I am living this way. You are lucky to have a home and nice parents. You should go back to them.”
Suddenly a noise started which soon became a shout. A few people were running towards them shouting and cursing the boy. The boy just said “Run” to Adel and started running in the opposite direction.
..... continued in last part
Summer of 2011 : Part 2
Please read Part 1 of this before reading this post.
Through the dark streets of Amenia, Adel wandered around kicking off the pebbles on the sides of the streets. After aimlessly walking on the unknown streets for hours, Adel knew he was lost and for a change was happy being lost. He was happy to be away from the restricting world of adults. While he was still smiling, lost in his own world, a sound came. A stone which he had kicked off had hit some metal object. A small child was sitting on the pavement playing with a metal utensil and the stone had hit his utensil.
Adel walked up to the child and asked what he was doing there? The child laughed seeing Adel and said a few unrecognizable syllables. Suddenly a young lady came and lifted the small child in her arms. Adel then saw a very small hut on the other side of the pavement where a few other people were staying. The lady started walking towards the hut when Adel called the lady in a reflex. The lady turned and asked what he wanted. Adel had never seen people living in huts built on street-sides. Innocently he asked why she is going towards the small dirty hut with her child. “That place is so dirty. Don’t go there,” said Adel.
The lady amused by Adel’s innocence and care replied, “Kid, we live there. That is our house. We don’t have enough money to live in a proper house.”
Adel, “Why don’t you have enough money? My dad has a lot of money. You can take some money from him and build a good house. I live in a big house at 8th floor and it’s very clean and beautiful.”
Lady, “You are still a small boy my dear. This world is not as good as you think it is. May you be untouched with the harsh cruelties of this world! But why are you wandering alone at this hour? Are you not scared? Do you know your way back home? Where are your parents?”
“You are such a good mother. You allowed your son to play even during the night. You love your child. But my mother scolds me a lot and never allows me to play. She does not love me so I have left my house,” Adel started walking as he said these words.
Adel increased his pace of walking fearing that the lady might get hold of him and return him to his parents. His mind was running at the same pace or even faster than his feet. The small and shabby shack was still in front of his eyes. How can anyone live in such a place? That place smelt so bad. Poor people have to suffer so much still they are happy. I want to be poor. At least then my mother would let me play the whole day and not shout at me even once!
Meanwhile, Adel’s parents were questioning all his friends & neighbors, frantically searching the nearby roads but Adel was nowhere to be found.
....continued in Part 3
Through the dark streets of Amenia, Adel wandered around kicking off the pebbles on the sides of the streets. After aimlessly walking on the unknown streets for hours, Adel knew he was lost and for a change was happy being lost. He was happy to be away from the restricting world of adults. While he was still smiling, lost in his own world, a sound came. A stone which he had kicked off had hit some metal object. A small child was sitting on the pavement playing with a metal utensil and the stone had hit his utensil.
Adel walked up to the child and asked what he was doing there? The child laughed seeing Adel and said a few unrecognizable syllables. Suddenly a young lady came and lifted the small child in her arms. Adel then saw a very small hut on the other side of the pavement where a few other people were staying. The lady started walking towards the hut when Adel called the lady in a reflex. The lady turned and asked what he wanted. Adel had never seen people living in huts built on street-sides. Innocently he asked why she is going towards the small dirty hut with her child. “That place is so dirty. Don’t go there,” said Adel.
The lady amused by Adel’s innocence and care replied, “Kid, we live there. That is our house. We don’t have enough money to live in a proper house.”
Adel, “Why don’t you have enough money? My dad has a lot of money. You can take some money from him and build a good house. I live in a big house at 8th floor and it’s very clean and beautiful.”
Lady, “You are still a small boy my dear. This world is not as good as you think it is. May you be untouched with the harsh cruelties of this world! But why are you wandering alone at this hour? Are you not scared? Do you know your way back home? Where are your parents?”
“You are such a good mother. You allowed your son to play even during the night. You love your child. But my mother scolds me a lot and never allows me to play. She does not love me so I have left my house,” Adel started walking as he said these words.
Adel increased his pace of walking fearing that the lady might get hold of him and return him to his parents. His mind was running at the same pace or even faster than his feet. The small and shabby shack was still in front of his eyes. How can anyone live in such a place? That place smelt so bad. Poor people have to suffer so much still they are happy. I want to be poor. At least then my mother would let me play the whole day and not shout at me even once!
Meanwhile, Adel’s parents were questioning all his friends & neighbors, frantically searching the nearby roads but Adel was nowhere to be found.
....continued in Part 3
Summer of 2011 : Part 1
It was a hot sunny summer afternoon. Adel was playing hide and seek with his friends since morning. In the deserted roads of the summer afternoon, their count of 1 to 50 was clearly audible from the 8th floor balcony. Every time the count started, Adel’s mother shouted for him and asked him to come home. He wouldn’t even bother and would run away to hide as if he was going to hide at a place his mom could never find. She cursed the other ladies as to why they were letting their children play in this heat and then again shouted at Adel.
After an hour of intermittent useless shouting, Adel’s mother stepped out of her house in anger. She would not let her son be a victim of the scorching sun. As she reached the play area, she frantically started searching for Adel. Smart as Adel was, he quickly hid in his secret place to escape the prying eyes of his mother. But to the utter surprise of Adel, one of his friends went to his mom and pointed his secret hide out to her. With an intense look of revenge, Adel left the ground while his mom was still shouting and scolding him. “You useless boy! Don’t you have any shame left? I have been shouting at you since last 2 hours and you didn’t even respond once. Do you know what time of the day it is? Is it the time to play? You have driven my crazy.....” his mom went on and on......
Sitting in his bed, Adel was sobbing. His mother’s harsh words were still clearly ringing in his ears. He is a big boy now. It’s his summer vacations and he had done his homework too. Then why can’t he play? What problem does his mother have when he was not even disturbing her? Why can’t adults be sensible like him and not disturb him when he is not disturbing them? “I won’t live in this house any more. I am a big boy and can live alone. Then I can play whole day and would not have to listen to my mom’s blabbering”, he thought and left the house. He did not bother to tell his mom where he was going. His mom thought he was upset and that would return home in sometime after sitting on the stairs. He had done this before when he had been upset. But this time he didn’t return. An hour went by, another hour, and another, the clock struck 6 but still Adel did not come home.
.....continued in part 2
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Some people go because they want to go,
Some others go because you let them go.
You are busy mourning over the gone.
They comfort you, make you smile,
And walk with you all the mile.
Silently they make their presence felt,
Waiting for your grief to melt.
Never do they reveal what they feel,
Waiting for you to heal.
They understand you all the while,
But when they say, you ignore it over a smile.
Your smile is what matters the most,
And thus leave those who matters the most.
They are gone not because they wanted to go
But because you let them go!
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Drivers drive me crazy!
I have always enjoyed travelling and whenever I was forced to think of a hobby of mine, this was the first thing which came to my mind. Unlike other travelogues, I would not detail out the places which I travelled to during my 2 month internship. This is about my interesting and not so interesting encounters in my journey.
In these 2 months, I have travelled by air, sea, rail and road. My project required me to travel to Pune from Mumbai every Monday morning & back to Mumbai every Friday evening. This was not as easy as it sounds. A cab used to pick me up from my cousin’s place at around 630 in the morning. The painful part was guiding the driver to my cousin’s place. No driver had even faintly heard of that place and it took around 1 hour to reach that place from central Mumbai. For his convenience, I had to get up 1 hour before normally I would have got up and explain him the directions in details. And still no one turned up in time. From 630 onwards my aunt, my bhabhi and I would be popping out of the balcony to see if the cab is coming. One of my bhabhi’s neighbours had even asked if it was some kind of a ritual for the three of us to stare the roads from our balcony every Monday morning! After getting into the cab, I used to feel that my work for the day is over and now it’s time to rest and the next three hours of the drive were well spent in day dreaming :)
One thing which I found common among all the drivers who used to pick/drop me was their irresistible desire to keep blabbering all the way. Some would talk about the route to my cousin’s place, some about their previous/next pickup, some would describe Mumbai from their experiences, some would want to know which place I belong to and get into details like where my family members are & their work. However much I hated it, I would still respond by saying just a yes/no or nodding my head for all their conversations. However there was one driver who kept bugging me and wasn’t quiet even for a minute in the entire drive. He seemed to have served many bookings from my company. He told me the names & addresses of all employees from my companies whom he had picked/dropped. And he did not limit the conversation just to this; he even started telling me about his conversations with those people! I was just too frustrated by all this and started talking over phone to avoid any further conversations with him. And suddenly he started asking me the directions knowing very well that I would surely respond to this even if I am busy on phone. I told him to go straight for another 10 kms but even if there was a small road going out of the main road, he would ask me whether to take that turn. I was staying at a naval base which was almost like an island into the sea and there was just one straight road connecting it. I was totally pissed off by the time I reached home. After getting out, I genuinely told him to take the same route to go back to which he replied “haan madam, sea se to nahi hi jayenge! mujhe raasta pata hai...aapko kis floor pe jana hai???”
In these 2 months, I have travelled by air, sea, rail and road. My project required me to travel to Pune from Mumbai every Monday morning & back to Mumbai every Friday evening. This was not as easy as it sounds. A cab used to pick me up from my cousin’s place at around 630 in the morning. The painful part was guiding the driver to my cousin’s place. No driver had even faintly heard of that place and it took around 1 hour to reach that place from central Mumbai. For his convenience, I had to get up 1 hour before normally I would have got up and explain him the directions in details. And still no one turned up in time. From 630 onwards my aunt, my bhabhi and I would be popping out of the balcony to see if the cab is coming. One of my bhabhi’s neighbours had even asked if it was some kind of a ritual for the three of us to stare the roads from our balcony every Monday morning! After getting into the cab, I used to feel that my work for the day is over and now it’s time to rest and the next three hours of the drive were well spent in day dreaming :)
One thing which I found common among all the drivers who used to pick/drop me was their irresistible desire to keep blabbering all the way. Some would talk about the route to my cousin’s place, some about their previous/next pickup, some would describe Mumbai from their experiences, some would want to know which place I belong to and get into details like where my family members are & their work. However much I hated it, I would still respond by saying just a yes/no or nodding my head for all their conversations. However there was one driver who kept bugging me and wasn’t quiet even for a minute in the entire drive. He seemed to have served many bookings from my company. He told me the names & addresses of all employees from my companies whom he had picked/dropped. And he did not limit the conversation just to this; he even started telling me about his conversations with those people! I was just too frustrated by all this and started talking over phone to avoid any further conversations with him. And suddenly he started asking me the directions knowing very well that I would surely respond to this even if I am busy on phone. I told him to go straight for another 10 kms but even if there was a small road going out of the main road, he would ask me whether to take that turn. I was staying at a naval base which was almost like an island into the sea and there was just one straight road connecting it. I was totally pissed off by the time I reached home. After getting out, I genuinely told him to take the same route to go back to which he replied “haan madam, sea se to nahi hi jayenge! mujhe raasta pata hai...aapko kis floor pe jana hai???”
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