Thought of the Day

During a meeting at my office today, suddenly there was an announcement. Like a natural reflex action, everyone in the room stood up after listening to it. By now each one of you must have guessed what the announcement could be. It was “As all of you know, today is Martyr’s Day. Exactly 60 years ago Father of our Nation laid his life for the freedom and development of this country.You are requested to stand up in silence for 2 minutes in memory of those thousands of martyrs who laid their lives in the freedom struggle.” And after 2 minutes we resumed the meeting. But the question is even in those 2 minutes did anyone even think of the freedom struggle and the martyrs? Does this forced silence for 2 minutes serve its purpose? Is standing up in silence for 2 minutes a year enough for remembering their struggle for freedom?

Same is our attitude towards Independence Day and Republic Day. It’s just another holiday for us. As a mark of Republic or Independence Day, the maximum most of us do is listening to a couple of patriotic songs. The so called leaders of our country will be in great demand this day for hoisting our national flag. Leaders like Nehru and Sardar Vallabh Bhai Patel held positions in government and were respected so much because they were always at the forefront when it came to defending our country from foreign powers. But today people who actually fight for our country are the least known. A common Indian like me (yeah…even though I am writing this post, I am no exception) would know more politicians than soldiers or defense officers.

I know very well that no single person (or even a group of people) can change our thinking overnight but the least we can do is remember and respect the freedom fighters and our soldiers whenever we feel for them. It should not be a forced one and limited to certain predefined time or day.


P.S: The irony of this post is that it was thought upon in those 2 minutes of silence. Only while composing the post, I realized the graveness of this issue. I am not sure if this article will be of any good to any of you but it certainly made me think.

Papa Khete Hain Bada Naam Karegi

New Year came and went by just like yet another day. This is true for majority of us and this used to be true for me too but only till last year. This New Year was a bit different for me, actually too good for me. For the first time in my life I won a lucky draw, took two resolutions and have successfully followed one of them for 10 days. But then as it goes with all good things, my good luck also didn’t last for long. I am having horrible time at work. During these 10 days, not even a single thing I tried out in office worked for me. Things have gone wrong to the extent that I have started having nightmares of my getting fired from this job and not getting one for next 6 months. And today after I did “my first and last blunder as a fresher” (according to my senior), I spent next 2 hours thinking of what I could do so as to have a peaceful life. And after racking my pea sized brain for a couple of hours I could think of only these options:

• Quit the job of a consultant, become an author and write novels. May be I become the next J.K.Rowling!!
• Become the host of some traveling show of Discovery, National Geographic or Travel & Living and “Go Places”!! After all, everyone says I am gonna “Go Places” and time has come to prove them correct.
• If some one is ready to pay a connoisseur (of food and wine), then your search has ended. I would love to appreciate good food & wine!!
• Become a receptionist. At least every one in the office will ‘notice’ me and I would be paid for what I am good at… talking on phone and smiling!!
• Get married to some rich guy (remember Shahid of Jab We Met!!)


P.S: Any sugestion is most welcome.

KIT KAT break banta hai !!!

I have been racking my brain since last week but still cannot understand why during one transaction a particular account is credited and during another similar transaction the same account is debited. I am still puzzled as to why balance sheet of a simple transaction like bank giving you 100 bucks contains 5 entries of debit n credit. So before its too late I thought I should take a break from clients and taxes and balance sheets. The last time I had put in so much of effort was one n a half years back (for placements). Even at that time I was successful at fooling the interviewers. So I am pretty sure that my efforts will pay and some day I will be able to confuse the clients and help them maintain their balance sheets.

The best way I know of taking a break while working is chatting and reading forwarded mails (Kit Kat was a good option had it been free!!). Consciously or unconsciously I have refrained from chatting these days, the reason being the same usual start with all my friends.

Me : Hiiii
Wassup
Friend : Hii
Tum batao credit debit kahan tak pahucha !! :P
Me : Kya yaar..humare politicians ko to kuch kaam nahi rehta hai..bekar ke complex tax laws formulate karte rehte hain aur yahan humari jaan nikalti hain implement karne me :(
Friend : ha ha :D
Acha hai..aish karo

(aish???!!!???!!!)

And thus starts my mockery. So I thought better to read forwarded mails and be happy in this short break than start chatting and realize my pathetic situation. But you know how good I am, just cannot stop thinking about my friends. So I extended my smile by forwarding one of the mails to my friends. But destiny had something else in store for me. My 5 min break (which was supposed to be relaxing) turned out to be a 50 min break (which was full of struggle). Just within 5 mins FOUR of my friends pinged me and told me that the pictures of that mail were not opening. Ohh !!! I never knew people actually bothered so much for a forward. I tried sending it again but still the pictures were not opening. “Leave it. I will send it some other time. I am a bit busy now” was my obvious reply but to my utter surprise my friends replied “Bhejo na. Even I am busy so I am asking you to send it. I want a break yaar!!”

After half and hour of my continous trial n error I figured out that pictures were not being sent from mozilla and it worked perfectly well with IE (I still don’t know why). And finally I helped my friends take a break but I needed another break. Thus I end up blogging.

Bachaaaaooo

I think my employers have found out my deepest secrets which only three people knew earlier. I don’t know who has let the cat out of the bag but somehow this fact is haunting me now. So I will tell you the entire story and it’s your responsibility now to help me find the culprit.

It had started some 22 years back. My parents’ day long discussions had gone in vain. They had wasted hours guessing (or rather fighting) whether I will say “Ma/mamma/mummy” or “papa/daddy” as my first words. But to everyone’s surprise, the first words which I had uttered at the tender age of 1 were “CREDIT” and “DEBIT”.
From that moment started my ordeal. Every other second my mom would force words like “beta say mamma” to my ears and without wasting a second I would say “Credit”. Pitying on my condition, my father would try his luck every now and then and plead me to say “papa or even daddy would do” but I said “Debit”!! My parents committed a blunder there by not recognizing the prodigy. After being subjected to prolonged mental torture and strong influences day and night, I finally uttered “ma”. But then this had left a very damaging effect on my brain. I almost forgot those two words and developed an aversion strong enough not to utter these two words till last Monday.

And now after 22 years the situation is something like this. My bosses are telling me to say “Credit” and “Debit” and each time the only words coming to my mind are “ma bachao” and “papa bachao”!!!

Sare jahan se acha Hindustan humara

Day: 16th Dec (coincides with one of the movies!!)
Venue: marina beach
Time: 1530 (IST)

For the first time in my life I was getting a VIP pass for some event. So I was very excited to be a part of this event. I had already received the VIP pass a couple of times in my dreams last night. The excitement of getting a VIP pass was a motivation good enough to wake me up by 9 (that too a sun morning!!). I just wanted to be seated in that special row as soon as possible. After a couple of calls it was decided that I will get my pass at around 1530 and the show was to start from 1630. Being an Indian from the core of my heart, I reached that place by 1550 (was actually glad that I was not much late). The sight of blue board with “NAVAL DISPLAY” brought a smile on our faces and finally I was handed my passes. We made ourselves comfortable in the “special front rows”.

Marina beach had a completely new look and we were awed to see this “clean, stink free, organized” beach with a hep crowd. And now we eagerly waited for the chief guest for the evening which would mark the start of the great evening. Surprisingly the chief guest “His Excellency, the governor of Tamil Nadu” (these words were repeated by the commentator umpteen times during that 30 mins) graced us by his presence sharp at 1630. We all stood up for the National Anthem and then suddenly I was filled with shame. I realized I was listening to it after 5-6 years and that I had forgotten a few words in between.

The display started by the formation of the great naval ships (there were some 8 of them). This show is a must for our Indian cricket commentators to know and learn what commentary is. The running commentary (both in English and Tamil) doubled the pleasure of this display. One by one the different INS (sorry, due to my pea sized brain I don’t remember the exact names) sailed with pride in front of us. And then the various sea warfare techniques like blowing up an oil rig, securing the beach head, were showed.

Marine commandos come in a Gemini and secure the beach of the enemies aided by covered attacks. The continuous firing by the commandos brought a chill in our spine but hardly did anyone of us know that this was nothing in comparison to what was to come.

We heard the words “look backwards” and we were taken aback to see four aircrafts come towards us. It was the Sagar Pawan Aerobatics team (only a few countries have such an aerobatics team). And during the next 20 mins everyone was on their toes turning left and right following the commentator’s “and left now” , “something on right”etc.At this moment I regreted my bunks from the march past practise which we used to have at school. Because everytime the commentator said "and here's something waiting for you in the left", I turned right ( & turned left when asked to turn right) and missed a few seconds of the fly. Thankfully people were awed by the aerobatics and no one had the time to notice me making a fool of myself!!The aircrafts performed breath taking aerobatics which included events like coming for head on collisions from opposite directions and turning just in the last minute, forming a heart (with a cupid’s arrow too!!) with its multicolored trailing fumes, sharp turns and a very low flying over us. They left the entire crowd mesmerized.

The fly past included the Indian Navy choppers like Chetak, Kamov, Dornier and IL76( the biggest of them). The STIE ( Short Team Insertion & Extraction) operation which is carried out to drop commandos to destroy the enemies and then rescue them, was equally fascinating.



All this while I longed to hear my bhaiya’s name from the commentator; wish he was also here.Finally towards the end of the Display, the Navy Band marched in front of the dais in unison and played some marching tunes. The Navy flag was then slowly pulled down and the the band marched back playing the popular martial tune "Saare Jahan Se Achcha". This was followed by the illumination (lighting up of all ships) and the fireworks which is used to attract the crowd’s attention while the chief guest and other VIPs leave.

Thus ended my most happening evening in Chennai. Special thanks to my bhaiya Lt Cdr Praveen Kr Sinha. It was a great change from my dull and boring evenings here and I enjoyed every second of it. And above all it gave me something to write upon too!!

P.S: I tried my level best to present this special event but due to my short term memory and incapability to remember names and minute details, I could not do justice to this great and memorable evening.

Warning: Read it at your own risk !!

I know I have become dull and boring and serious. I am no longer a fun person to talk to, no longer does any one want to chat with me, and no longer does any one want to read my blogs. But it’s not my fault entirely. What do I do when there are absolutely no great evenings/days to talk about, no humorous incidents to write about, no fun in life to share with you, no recent achievements (professional as well as personal) which I am proud of and can boast about it? What do I say to you when you crib about being alone in a city where you know so many people ,when I myself am in a city where I know just 2 other guys? What do I say to you when you crib about being over burdened by work, when I have been given absolutely no work and no reason to justify my salary since last three months? What do I say to you when you have an exotic lunch & crib about overspending, when I don’t even have an option of eating decent food? What do I do when I want to make you smile by my posts but end up with a post like this??

It's all a matter of time

Hey people, please don’t call the police. I know I have committed a heinous crime but then the circumstances forced me to do so. My parents had never ever imagined in their weirdest of dreams that their daughter will become a murder some day. But it’s true. I have KILLED time. I have been killing time since two months @ 10 hours a day. And now I know what IT professionals are paid for.

In spite of the “stringent IT policies” almost all IT professionals (esp. consultants) do the same set of things at office. They check all their mail accounts every two minutes hoping that some of their counterparts would have forwarded a mail. Thanks to numerous proxies, chatting is still considered to be one of the favorite time pass. They buzz every person online and in very desperate situations send offline messages also. Some intellectuals among us also rack their brains in solving online puzzles. People of this league have klueless mornings, klueless afternoons and klueless evenings!!

Some furzi consultants like me read novels as PDF so that the client thinks you are racking your brain with some user guide or implementation manual. Some other intellectual consultants keep themselves updated with the latest happenings round the globe. Other esteemed ways of killing time are downloading songs, checking daily horoscope, searching for status messages etc.

A couple of precious office hours are also reserved for managing the hard earned money. Share market, online investments, online bill payments, internet banking form an integral part of work. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. So after all these tiring hours of surfing, consultants add some spice to their office life by conducting meetings. And thus another couple of hours fly by. And if still some time is left, people like me update their blogs.

P.S : A couple of words are borrowed from Tushar's repository of jokes.